 | Nadine Reimer Penner ACSW, LSCSW, s Director of Bereavement at Harry Hynes Memorial Hospice. She is certified as a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and by the Academy of Certified Social Workers. Nadine's memberships include National Council of Hospice Professionals, the National Hospice and Palliative Care Association. She has made presentations to the National Hospice Organization, and the Association for Death Education and Counseling. Your can reach Nadine at (316) 219-1761 or FAX (316) 265-6066, or by e-mail at nreimerpenner@hynesmemorial.org |
Hospice
2004-10-01 15:07:00
Does dad know I’m there?
: I'm not sure my dad knows I'm there when I visit anymore and visiting is very difficult for me emotionally. Is it doing him any good?
ANSWER: Seeing a parent's health deteriorate is difficult particularly if one can't communicate in the way you are accustomed to. There are many ways you can continue to let your dad know you love him. Experts believe that hearing is the last sense that is lost so think of things you can do that he can listen to. Talk about what you remember when you were growing up. Tell him what you have learned about life. Sing or play favorite songs. Read favorite stories or scripture verses. Share stories about his grandchildren. Watch your father's facial expressions. You might be surprised what triggers a response from him. Touch is another way to communicate. Hold his hand while talking to him. Try gently massaging his hands with lotion. Comb his hair. Keep in contact with the people who are his primary caregivers. They may have other suggestions for you to try.One of my favorite stories is Love You Forever by Robert N. Munsch. Munsch tells the story of a little boy growing up and becoming an adult. The simple yet powerful story illustrates the love of parents for their children and the love of those same children as adults for their parents. Read it for yourself, read it to your father, and then read it to your children. The story may give you another answer to your question.
