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Lisa Vermillion
Lisa Vermillion is President and co-owner of Get Fit Bee Fit and Thin and Healthy Weight Management. Lisa opened Get Fit- 4 years ago in Valley Center, after receiving certifications thorough the American Council on Exercise as a Weight and Lifestyle Management Consultant and Certified Personal Trainer. In January, she Grand Opened Thin and Healthy Weight Management in the same location. Lisa not only provides weight loss programs for individuals but she also implements business wellness programs for small businesses and large corporations. Additionally, Lisa is a Certified Life Coach providing guidance for individuals in the areas of career, relationship and personal development. She is available for speaking engagements in the areas of Physical Fitness, Weight Management, or any Life Coaching area (goal setting, positive attitude, sales, etc). Lisa can be reached for questions or speaking engagements by phone (316) 755-1115 or email at mvmillion@yahoo.com
Diet & Nutrition
2009-02-01 11:16:00
Controlling negative thoughts
Question: What to do about having negative thoughts?
Answer: I was speaking with a friend the other day. She revealed she is struggling with some goals she set earlier. She maintained that while reaching those goals is still important to her, when adversity appears in other areas of her life, her goals go by the way side. As we talked, she began to realize her “self talk” was mostly negative. Words like, “I don’t deserve to have more” and “There’s no use setting goals, I won’t achieve them anyway”. Although most everyone experiences similar rhetoric from time to time; recognizing the negative thought pattern, challenging those thoughts, and reframing them can help you accomplish any goal. First, recognize negative thought patterns. Negative thoughts come from past experiences or things other people have said. For example, I was teased mercilessly as a child for being heavy. In fact, from the time I was about 4 years old till the time I was a freshman in High School I can recall being called an assortment of names, therefore I grew up believing I was fat, dumb, and no one liked me. Even after I lost weight, when anyone got upset with me my immediate thought was, “I am a horrible person because that person is angry with me; they don’t like me.” Negative thoughts also arise from emotional or physical abuse or neglect, any type of loss, or simply buying into media influences. Whatever the cause, the key is recognizing the patterns so you can begin overcoming them. Second, challenge those thoughts. Write each statement down, and then ask yourself, “Is that statement really true?” Negative thoughts usually arise when you are fearful about something. FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real. For example, Susan is in a job she really hates and yet she is fearful about exploring other options. She may say something like, “I’m too dumb to do anything else”. In my personal example, I was so fearful of repeating the pain of ridicule that I let people take advantage of me. My self talk was “I must do everything in my power to make sure I don’t disagree with people so they will like me”. Commonly I see people who have set backs in their weight loss or other goals. Perhaps, they have reached for a particular goal many times and have not yet been successful. Rather than experience the fear of failure, they hide behind the negative thought “I don’t care “. When you truly analyze negative statements, you can see the lie clearly. In truth, negative thoughts give you a way out. Instead of facing the fear, you hide behind falsehood, which may be easier short term, but leaves you miserable in the long run. Finally, reframe negative thoughts into positive, written statements that you look at on a regular basis. Divide a piece of paper down the middle. Write negative thoughts down one side; reframe it into a positive statement on the other. For example, instead of “I’m too dumb” write “I can learn anything I need to learn”. Instead of “I need to make everyone happy” write “Everyone gets to choose their happiness; I’m only responsible for mine.” Instead of “I don’t care” write “I care and I am taking positive steps toward my goal from this point on.” Post your new positive thoughts, reading them regularly. Fill your brain with positive thoughts, squelching negative thoughts. Your body follows whatever your brain believes. Make sure it believes the truth. You can reach any goal by recognizing negative thought patterns, challenging them for truth and translating them into written, positive belief statements. When your brain believes you can, you can.
 
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