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Shanna ParrishTaylor
Shanna Parrish-Taylor is the Director of Nursing at Vintage Place Assisted Living. She is a RN with 9 years long term care experience, experience in critical care as well as hospice setting. Shanna is currently working on her master’s degree towards obtaining her ANRP. For more information on Shanna or Vintage Place please call 620-231-4554.
Senior Living
2012-10-03 10:22:07
How can I manage helping two generations?
Q- I am in the position of being near retirement age (with limited resources), have adult children living at home, and a mother that also requires assistance. I am stressed and fearful about the increasing costs, but love my family and want to help. Do you have any guidance you could give me?
A- The position you are in is common, and growing even more common as people navigate the tricky economy. It is so common, in fact, that the term "sandwich generation" was coined just to describe people in your situation. As much as you love your family, it is important to keep the big picture in mind. As tempting as it may be to use all of the available resources (such as savings) now, doing so can only make things more difficult later. Instead, be strategic in finding new resources that would apply to yourself and your loved ones and direct the resources you already have to places that offer the most long-term advantages. First, get a clear picture of the situation. Factor in all of your personal current and future resources that are certain. It may be that you decide to work a little longer or utilize other talents to launch a business. Do the same for your loved ones. Next, allocate funds wisely. As much as you want to help your children, remember that they have greater job opportunities and longer to pay off debt. Also, these are the resources you will someday need to help provide care for yourself. Do not be tempted to use savings to help pay off their debt. Instead, help connect them to resources that will help them make positive moves forward such as affordable education and training. Change is difficult for everyone, especially as we age. For the Sandwich generation, helping parents make the hard financial decisions is especially difficult. For some it means selling the home that they had hoped to live in indefinitely. For others, it is liquidating heirlooms. It is not easy, but sometimes it is the difference in receiving necessary care. One of the expenses that you should keep at the top of the priority list is covering yourself and your parents with insurance. Should any of you become sick and require long-term care, this would be the most important tool you have for keeping things on track.
 
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